something to think about
Remember living in a dorm? Well, I don't know about you, but our RA's were always decorating exciting! and cool! boards that lined the hallways in order to make our residence feel more like a home. Granted, I don't know many homes that have "The more you know about safe sex the better!" pasted across its foyer in multicolored cut out letters, but you know what I mean.
Anyway, my sophomore year I had one of those life changing RA's-- and by "life changing" I mean "willing to buy us beer"-- who was always putting a lot of effort into his boards, and even more effort into making us like him. Well, one night when we got back from a gourmet dinner of waffles and cereal at the dining hall we noticed that Matt Ra (as we called him) made a giant construction paper map of the United States and hung it up in our lobby. Matt was proudly standing next to it when we walked in, and he asked us, "So, what do you think we should do with this? I was thinking everybody could put a little sticker dot on the state they think they're going to end up living in. What do you guys think?"
Now remember, this was college, and in college everybody is an idiot. So, rather than go along with Matt's awesome! idea, I suggested, "Forget that. How about everybody marks off every state they've ever masturbated in, this way we can see if we fill up the whole country." Come on, I was 19, leave me alone. Well, Matt said no. We did it anyway.
When word got out what was going on with the board, everybody got excited. I was living in a tiny dorm-- 30 guys, 30 girls total-- so word spread fast. It became a game, trying to see how many we could fill up. When our hockey team had a tournament in North Dakota we were thrilled because Derek promised to do what he had to do to finally cross it off the list. When Alan and his girlfriend were visiting Kentucky we asked, "Do you think you can sneak one?" When people were planning Spring Break trips I pleaded, "Somebody has to go Oregon! We need Oregon!"
By the time Matt finally caught wind of what was up and tore the map down I think we were at 30 something states. Not bad considering I went to a state school and 97% of the people there were from New York, New Jersey, and Maryland. I'll take it.
I'm not sure what made me think of this today. Maybe it's because I've been staring at that Penthouse picture for the past 3 days, I don't know. But anyway, I just thought I'd share.
Oh, and for the record: 7. How about you?
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b at 4:24 PM
